A reality TV contestant is blindsided when she’s trapped on a farm despite the location literally being in the title of the show. James Weir recaps.
A Farmer Wants A Wife contestant quits the show on Tuesday night because she hates farms.
Hey, c’mon – before you judge, listen to her reasoning. Firstly, she says, the farm is dirty. There are also animals.
We can understand how she was completely blindsided by this entire experience.
It’s another busy morning on Farmer Bert’s property. The cattle need herding. Fences need fixing. Barely any time to stop for smoko.
Out of nowhere, we hear screams in the distance. Bluey the cattle dog jumps into action and races down the hill. He’s heading for the chook shed. We immediately follow.
Our hearts pound at the thought of the scene we’re about to walk in on. Maybe one of the girls accidentally got her hair extensions caught in a tractor engine. A scalping really would be a reality TV first.
The wailing gets louder. We burst into the pen and find Angela hunched over.
“Argh! My brand new white shoes!” she wails while brushing grime off her sneakers.
Sometimes trauma pushes us to meet the truest version of ourselves. Today, in the dirty chookpen, Angela finally realises who she is.
“So what’s happened is, I’ve come to the conclusion that I just don’t wanna live on a farm, with lots of animals,” she confides in us, after eventually managing to calm down.
A gust of wind then picks up, completely ruining her hair:
Her eyes well up again.
“I definitely like to be in my beautiful house in the city,” she says.
She books the next Rex flight back to the big smoke.
Meanwhile, Farmer Dean is still missing after walking out on his three sheilas while they were having a cat fight during last night’s dinner. At day break, we steal the 7News helicopter and conduct an air search. We find him atop a mountain, sleeping on the hood of his ute.
We herd him back to the homestead where he’s forced to follow through on last night’s elimination ceremony that he skipped out on. But he doesn’t just dump one girl. He dumps two. And then professes his love for that Teegan chick — even though it has only been seven days and there was an anonymous text message alleging she has a secret boyfriend in the outside world.
“Teegan, I’ve fallen in love with you,” Dean mumbles.
We’re blindsided. More blindsided than Angela when she realised a show called Farmer Wants A Wife would require her to visit a farm.